Thursday, March 14, 2013

Almost ready

Today someone asked me why I haven't been blogging right as I was taking pics to add to a blog post.
I told you all a while ago that I was tired of myself being a negative Nelly and I want this to be Abby's place and not my look at how crazy Abby's Mom is place. You guys know how poor me I can be or psycho Mom and believe me, I delete about half of what I right when I'm mad or sad so you never even see it.
So, an explanation...or a couple of explanations and my next blog will be back to business as usual.

Life has been difficult here. Abby is unaffected. Ive made sure of that.

George is still unemployed. We are going on 5 months now. He has applied everywhere. I don't know what else to do. I thought we were poor when he worked. At this point I would think we were rolling in it if we got the same income back. We eat out of food pantries and rarely have the bare necessities. We cant even run the errands we would like to save the gas. If we have to go to the same area two days in a row I put it off as to not to waste gas. We have had to take and George down to one meal a day most days in order to not go without food. One the bright side, that weight Ive been trying to lose doesnt seem to be much of an issue anymore.

We lost another caregiver. Its been about 6 weeks now. I'm exhausted. Probably more than I have ever been. I haven't been able to get around to hiring a new one out of exhaustion and frustration
If  you remember our van was stolen. We did have a 14 year old van donated and we are thankful. Abby is getting so heavy that trying to load her in the smaller van is a chore with her weight and length.

My mother passed away 6 weeks ago. We were estranged and had been off and on since I was 17 and completely for at least 13 years. There is some guilt that comes with that. I also have this inner need to make sure my brother is taken care of. I just don't know how. She passed without a will which leaves me as her next of kin. I am trying to do the morally right thing and make sure everything goes to my brother but the courts wont let it be that easy. I really toss and turn over this one. Neither one of us can afford a lawyer. I only want to sign my rights away. It is what is right and what she would have wanted.

There are several things we need for Abby and I have no means to get them and it makes me sick to my stomach.Im sure it will all work out eventually. Im just getting kind of fed up with that whole one day dream.

On the other hand I do have people that are helping by donating food and possibly one therapy. I will know more on that next week.

I do have good news to share and that will come in the next few posts.

Bare with me.

I'm trying.